The debacle known as "Teen Wolf Too"

It's been almost 2 weeks now since I was flipping through the channels on a Saturday afternoon (the day before I started this blog, in fact) and came across a movie I haven't seen since I was in second grade. I now know why it had been nearly 25 years in between viewings. It was because it sucked. It sucked BAD.

First, some background....

I loved the original "Teen Wolf" film as a kid , which was released in 1985. In fact, it's still one of my favorites. It is by no means a classic of American cinema, but it is a highly entertaining movie that has heart. It also had likeable characters and a fun premise. For those who haven't seen it, Michael J. Fox plays an awkward teen who becomes the star of the basketball team when he becomes a werewolf capable of amazing athletic feats.

I remember my mom renting it from the video store (on a video disc no less...anyone remember those? If not, here's the obligatory link http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Capacitance_Electronic_Disc). Anyway, I still recall mom picking it off the shelf and saying I might like it because it has "the guy from 'Family Ties' in it".

I ended up loving the movie and its portrayal of the lives of a bunch of '80s teenagers, one of whom happens to turn into a werewolf. I've been to my share of parties, but I don't think any have been as fun as the one portrayed in that movie, with the fun party games involving feathered-haired girls writhing around in pudding. I remember it airing on TV when I was in first grade and we taped it onto a blank VHS tape for future viewing. I watched THE HELL out of that tape!

I was especially fond of the two love interests in the movie, the characters Boof (what the fuck kinda name is that?) and Pamela. Once again, like with "Three's Company," you had the best of both worlds with the sexy blonde and down-to-earth brunette. The actresses who portrayed these characters didn't go on to do much else...I saw the chick who played Boof on an episode of "Charles In Charge" and the actress who played Pamela was in the '80s horror flick "Cheerleader Camp." Despite their less than impressive resumes, I thought their performances were quite memorable.

Scott "Teen Wolf" Howard with Pamela. I can do that.

Hey, how about a sequel?
The movie was a success, and two years later a sequel was released. Seems like a no-brainer right? Teen Wolf was such a hot property that there was even a cartoon!

                               

Upon my initial viewing I noticed there were some significant changes in the cast and characters from the first film. Instead of Micheal J. Fox reprising his role as Scott Howard, we instead got Jason Bateman playing Scott's cousin Todd. Also returning from the first film was Scott's dad (and Todd's uncle) Harold Howard and "Chubbs", the fat guy from the first film. Two additional characters from the first film appeared also, except they were played by different actors. That's how bad this movie was folks. They couldn't even get the original guys who played Stiles and Coach Finstock. 

The movie revolves around Todd trying to fit in as a dorky freshman at Hamilton College. First off, how weird is that he is dropped off by his uncle at college, and is friends with all of his cousin's friends who all mysteriously ended up at the same college? And they never did explain what happened to Scott...

He was captured by authorities after satisfying his "meat tooth." *Crickets* Yes, that was a bad pun.

Like Rocky II and Home Alone 2, this movie followed the same premise as the first film almost exactly. In the first film, Scott's wolf powers helped the high school basketball team win some games. In the sequel, Todd's wolf powers help the college boxing team (because colleges are well-known for their boxing teams of course). This movie differed from the first film in one major way, though: musical sequences which helped pad out the running time.

The first musical sequence is honestly one of the most horrible in film history...it features Todd Howard in wolf mode wearing an '80s style skinny-tie and suit dancing to the old '60s song "Do You Love Me." Why? All I can ask is why. WHY WHY WHY was this is in the movie? I have a few theories. Padding out the running time in an already weak-plotted movie was one theory. Cashing in on the '60s nostalgia that was currently in vogue was another. Here's a clip, if you're brave enough...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JNKeFqMLWRs

The second musical sequence was utilized in a montage that showed Todd cramming for some test he blew off studying for because he was busy being a big 'old bad ass wolf, driving around Gomez Addam's bad ass car. Yes, the guy who played Gomez on "The Addams Family" tv show played the dean in this movie.

Lamborghini? Check. Hot broads? Check. Miami Vice suit? Check. Unholy freak of nature? Check.

The song that played during the study sequence was "Send Me An Angel," which I guess was some metaphor for how the average girl who he dug at first and then spurned for the skanks was now helping him. I can think of at least two other movies this song appeared in. Originally it was in some movie that I can't think of the name of, but it was about BMX bikes and featured the chick who played Becky on "Full House." It was also in the '80s kid movie classic "The Wizard." I think the song was utilized better in both of those movies.

Was there ever a movie you liked as a kid, and then watched years later and realized you didn't like anymore? It could have been any number of reasons...maybe you realized after years of growing up and sampling other cinematic fare that it wasn't a quality film. Or maybe it was something that was enjoyable within the original context of the times it came out in, but seems out of place in this modern world. Well, with Teen Wolf Too, I remember not liking it as a kid, and I do not like it even more as an adult. It's hard to sit through, even for the ironic humor factor. It will always be a pale imitation of the original classic (which itself was no Kubrick film).

And here, lastly, is the trailer. Remember that trailers are made to make someone WANT to see a movie.